When does wanting justice shift to revenge?
This crossed my mind as I read an article about a woman whose daughter was killed in a car accident and the driver of the car - who was intoxicated - left the country, returning to her native Peru, thus avoiding prosecution.
The driver was a college friend of the girl who was killed. A group of them had been out partying, and the driver was drunk. The accident killed one girl, paralyzed another. The penalty that was in plea bargaining negotiations was for manslaughter, which the mother wanted to reject.
I understand all of this - the mother's feelings, the outrage that this girl (now woman) is back in Peru and facing no consequences for her actions - she did kill someone (extradition did not cover her specific crime). But I also know her daughter was in the car and had also been drinking. Underage. Had she been the one behind the wheel, would the mother feel the same way?
I'm not suggesting people should get away with drunk driving - we need to educate our kids better, and penalties need to be stiff. But I'm just curious about the mother's motivation.
And while I'm at it, why is the death penalty seen as justice? Isn't it more about revenge? I am surprised at how many Christians I know are all for executing criminals, when the Bible I read seems to stress forgiveness ...
Further, I'm not blaming Mitt Romney for the ex-con who killed two people, just because he was furloughed (or released or paroled or whatever) by a judge who was appointed by Romney; I am not going to hold him personally responsible. If he were using his crystal ball then OK, he's to blame. My guess is we're all human and tragedies happen - if we could all act differently and make amends I'm sure we all would - who hasn't made a decision that in retrospect may not have been the best one? Yes, this one is more tragic, but as I said, I'm sure it was unintentional. Should someone pay? The criminal, sure. But how high do we want to go? Should we hold responsible all the voters who put Romney into office? His campaign manager?
Hillary (does she even need a last name?) is in town today. (It's Clinton, in case you're not sure.) I am not going. I kind of wanted to hear her speak, but I'm on the fence about her. I don't hate her, don't even mind her. But she isn't my No. 1 choice at the moment. And seeing/hearing her was going to require a hefty donation, and I'm not sure I'm prepare to shell out that sort of money for her. Yet.
I was, naturally, flattered to get a personal invitation. But I'm not so deluded that I think I'm really that special - please, anyone they thought might pay got one, I'm sure. But I can pretend, just for a moment, that they went to only an elite few.
And for my final thought: Thank GOD that Marie Osmond got booted off first last night. Dancing with the Stars - sorry. At first, I thought she was fun to watch. But she began to get on my nerves. I watched her on Larry King and she bugged the hell out of me - she is all about not taking any responsibility for what goes wrong in her life. The twice-divorced Ms. Osmond said, If only her parents could rear all the men in the world ... OK, I get it - you are divorced - twice - because the men are to blame. You are without fault. Nice. Spoiled brat, more like it.
And on DWTS, she could not accept criticism graciously - she would defy the judges, saying, I refuse to accept that. Excuse me? And as one blogger pointed out, I do not want to hear her say, I'm a doll designer! I'm nearly 50! or I have 50 kids! ever, ever again. Good riddance!
And even worse, people who watched that show live had to endure Celine Dion singing not once, but TWICE! Thank goodness for TiVo ...
Happy Wednesday, all!
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Monday, November 26, 2007
Complaints
The cleaning woman broke my vacuum.
Of this I am absolutely sure. She was the last one to use it. Trust me - I didn't even to have ask the girls if one them didn't sneak in and use it without permission; I just know.
Naturally, I am annoyed. I called her, the owner of the company, to complain. Which I say I hate to do - I don't like to be a whiner, someone who's never satisfied.
But the fact is, I have complained about the cleaning woman before. I have complained several times. One week, she totally skipped the half bath. Another week, it was our bathroom. One week, all of the sinks looked dirty; yet another week, the floors did not look as if they had been mopped. The trash was taken out in half the house (I would prefer that she didn't take out any of the trash, but why, then, only half? When I had asked them to leave it be?). Underneath the desks was not vacuumed.
I sound really picky. But I also know the size of the check I write, and I think I should get what I'm paying for. She's a very nice woman, but she does not clean well. I can only be nice for so long before I get resentful.
Looks like I'm out whatever the price of a new vacuum piece is. It's big piece. They offered to pay for it, but still, it's a pain.
*****
An acquaintance of mine told a story in a blog. This is someone I've known for a long time (though I no longer see this person) and she told a story that I know, for a fact, is not true. It hearkens back to our youth; I was there, and she totally distorted what happened.
Why do I care? Good question - I suppose because it makes her out to be someone she isn't, someone much more important. And I know she is only being half truthful. I suppose it could be the way she remembers things, but I doubt it.
I have decided not to call her on it (and I doubt if she read this, which she doesn't, she would recognize herself - she is too self-important to read this, and I'm guess she believes her version of events). I am not one to leave mean comments - why bother? When people write things I dislike or find fault with, I am not inclined to comment - I so rarely leave positive feedback, why bother with snippy comments? I guess I prefer silent loathing.
But to clarify, the vacuum story? Totally true.
*****
I grew up with a friend who was a bully.
This came back to me as I read about a workshop held in the Houston schools to help girls identify with bullying. Girls who make unkind comments about their friends, belittling them, making them feel inferior, these girls are considered bullies. And one of my "friends" displayed this behavior.
There was a group of us - at one time four, then three - and the one who somehow considered herself the most *important* constantly made cutting remarks about the rest of us. I'm not sure why we tolerated it, but we did.
And they were mean remarks - insults about how we dressed, about our houses (which never lived up to hers - though I don't recall that her house was amazing), about our families. She called my brother names, made fun of what I wore. She made fun of another friend's parents, of their jobs, their pets. We did class reports in Spanish, talking about our parent's jobs, and when one guy said his dad was a mail carrier, she somehow found that funny. (I told my mom later, and my mom, who worked in personnel at the post office at the time, said she should watch it - that boy's dad probably made more than her dad did.) Another time I mentioned going shopping after Christmas when things would be cheaper and somehow she found this worthy of her disdain - the idea of having to save money was beneath her.
(This was a not wealthy family, just so you know - she was a middle-class kid, just like I was, who grew up in a modest three-bedroom ranch house. Nice parents.)
She moved away in junior high, and when I look back at how she behaved, why she treated us, her friends, that way, I am at a loss. Why would you want to make your friends feel badly about themselves? How did this make her feel better?
I saw her a few years ago, and I am happy to say she has changed, that she outgrew this destructive behavior. I keep an eye on my own girls, and I would not care to see them participate in this behavior. Girls needs to support their friends, not victimize them.
Such a waste of energy. And for what?
*****
Must go online to order new Missouri sweatshirts ... we'll be needing something to wear in New Orleans ...
Of this I am absolutely sure. She was the last one to use it. Trust me - I didn't even to have ask the girls if one them didn't sneak in and use it without permission; I just know.
Naturally, I am annoyed. I called her, the owner of the company, to complain. Which I say I hate to do - I don't like to be a whiner, someone who's never satisfied.
But the fact is, I have complained about the cleaning woman before. I have complained several times. One week, she totally skipped the half bath. Another week, it was our bathroom. One week, all of the sinks looked dirty; yet another week, the floors did not look as if they had been mopped. The trash was taken out in half the house (I would prefer that she didn't take out any of the trash, but why, then, only half? When I had asked them to leave it be?). Underneath the desks was not vacuumed.
I sound really picky. But I also know the size of the check I write, and I think I should get what I'm paying for. She's a very nice woman, but she does not clean well. I can only be nice for so long before I get resentful.
Looks like I'm out whatever the price of a new vacuum piece is. It's big piece. They offered to pay for it, but still, it's a pain.
*****
An acquaintance of mine told a story in a blog. This is someone I've known for a long time (though I no longer see this person) and she told a story that I know, for a fact, is not true. It hearkens back to our youth; I was there, and she totally distorted what happened.
Why do I care? Good question - I suppose because it makes her out to be someone she isn't, someone much more important. And I know she is only being half truthful. I suppose it could be the way she remembers things, but I doubt it.
I have decided not to call her on it (and I doubt if she read this, which she doesn't, she would recognize herself - she is too self-important to read this, and I'm guess she believes her version of events). I am not one to leave mean comments - why bother? When people write things I dislike or find fault with, I am not inclined to comment - I so rarely leave positive feedback, why bother with snippy comments? I guess I prefer silent loathing.
But to clarify, the vacuum story? Totally true.
*****
I grew up with a friend who was a bully.
This came back to me as I read about a workshop held in the Houston schools to help girls identify with bullying. Girls who make unkind comments about their friends, belittling them, making them feel inferior, these girls are considered bullies. And one of my "friends" displayed this behavior.
There was a group of us - at one time four, then three - and the one who somehow considered herself the most *important* constantly made cutting remarks about the rest of us. I'm not sure why we tolerated it, but we did.
And they were mean remarks - insults about how we dressed, about our houses (which never lived up to hers - though I don't recall that her house was amazing), about our families. She called my brother names, made fun of what I wore. She made fun of another friend's parents, of their jobs, their pets. We did class reports in Spanish, talking about our parent's jobs, and when one guy said his dad was a mail carrier, she somehow found that funny. (I told my mom later, and my mom, who worked in personnel at the post office at the time, said she should watch it - that boy's dad probably made more than her dad did.) Another time I mentioned going shopping after Christmas when things would be cheaper and somehow she found this worthy of her disdain - the idea of having to save money was beneath her.
(This was a not wealthy family, just so you know - she was a middle-class kid, just like I was, who grew up in a modest three-bedroom ranch house. Nice parents.)
She moved away in junior high, and when I look back at how she behaved, why she treated us, her friends, that way, I am at a loss. Why would you want to make your friends feel badly about themselves? How did this make her feel better?
I saw her a few years ago, and I am happy to say she has changed, that she outgrew this destructive behavior. I keep an eye on my own girls, and I would not care to see them participate in this behavior. Girls needs to support their friends, not victimize them.
Such a waste of energy. And for what?
*****
Must go online to order new Missouri sweatshirts ... we'll be needing something to wear in New Orleans ...
Saturday, November 24, 2007
We're No. 1?!?!?
Could be ... No. 4 (or 3) defeats No. 2 Kansas, leads the entire game. OK, so they had a few too many penalties, so they could have held Kansas back, not allowed so many long passes. But it doesn't matter - they won! And they could be No. 1 this week.
Missouri will play Oklahoma in San Antonio next weekend. We likely will not go, but it will be exciting, none the less. Go Tigers!!!
Missouri will play Oklahoma in San Antonio next weekend. We likely will not go, but it will be exciting, none the less. Go Tigers!!!
Hola! from San Antonio
San Antonio is touted in the guide books as a charming city, known for its mingling of Native American, Deep South, and Old Mexican cultures. The eighth largest city in the United States, it boasts the lovely downtown Riverwalk, museums, restaurants, and the history of 300-year-old missions.
Each of these features is a true delight. Each is undoubtedly much more enjoyable when it's warmer outside than 45 degrees. And not raining. But I'm not complaining - we are actually quite enjoying the cooler weather, a welcome break after so many months of really hot days.
None the less, we are loving it. Thanksgiving day was spent at home, where Gary, the girls and I cooked for our guests: turkey, stuffing w/prunes and apricots, sweet potato casserole, green beans w/bacon (I cringe from the recipe that calls for cream of mushroom soup and those fried onions - can't do it), Gulliver's corn, baked mashed potatoes, cranberry chutney, rolls, pumpkin ribbon bread, and pumpkin pie. None of it is low-fat; all of it is wonderful. Gave us a chance to use our seldom-used china in our rarely used dining room. We started the day with the neighborhood Turkey Trot two-mile walk/run and finished by playing lots of Mah Jongg and drinking. Can't think of any better way to spend the day.
All I'll dispense with listing the many things for which I am thankful - I know how fortunate I am.
Friday morning we left for San Antonio. (Can you believe I drove away from all those leftovers? We'll have plenty to eat when we return home ...) We have a lovely hotel on the Riverwalk, and everything is within walking distance. Yesterday we walked to the Alamo, past the historic Joske's department store, the Menger Hotel, La Villita, St. Joseph's Church, Hemisfair Park, and the Riverwalk. It was lovely. And it was cold - 45 and drizzly. We did dress properly, but wow - that wind can go right through you.
Dinner was at Hard Rock Cafe when we realized the kids had never been there, and we figured Alison would get a kick out of it - never mind that we have one in Houston. Man, there is a lot of pointless rock "memorabilia" out there.
Last night was the lighting of the holiday lights on the Riverwalk and the parade of barges down the river. We considered watching from the hotel balcony, but it was very windy out there, and we were up high enough that it was hard to see well. So we went to the Riverwalk right behind out hotel and were able to watch from there. It was great - the lighted barges all had music - some had live bands - so it was more of floating concert to the strains of Jimmy Buffett, Van Morrison, Freddy Fender, Los Lobos, and countless showtunes. Such fun - we thoroughly enjoyed it.
Today we drove out to see several of the missions on the outskirts of the city. We only toured one - you get the idea - but we did like the movie about the development of the missions and the way the indigenous populations were treated by the conquering Spaniards - interesting stuff. We went to lunch at the Liberty Saloon, a funny little place in a building that lists - noticeably - to the left. The food was great and the atmosphere fun, even if you did have to make sure your things didn't roll across the room (!) Their pies were fantastic.
The girls wanted to check out the Children's Museum, so we did, and I'm sorry to say that we have nearly outgrown such places. Came back to the hotel, went to Happy Hour and played Yahtzee - four Yahtzees, four dances (you have to do the Yahtzee dance, even in public), and Alison tested all of my and Gary's drinks - we are so proud of her knowledge of mixed drinks. It should serve her well should she continue her interest in drama and need to sideline as a waiter or bartender - !
We are now watching Kansas v. Missouri - we saw one of Gary's college friends on Game Day this morning who now works for ESPN. Truman the Tiger Webkinz is watching with us for luck ... I am really hoping I can e-mail my former colleague who went to KU, giddy with victory. It's a little too early to gloat - I'll just keep my fingers crossed.
Mizzou-rah!!
Each of these features is a true delight. Each is undoubtedly much more enjoyable when it's warmer outside than 45 degrees. And not raining. But I'm not complaining - we are actually quite enjoying the cooler weather, a welcome break after so many months of really hot days.
None the less, we are loving it. Thanksgiving day was spent at home, where Gary, the girls and I cooked for our guests: turkey, stuffing w/prunes and apricots, sweet potato casserole, green beans w/bacon (I cringe from the recipe that calls for cream of mushroom soup and those fried onions - can't do it), Gulliver's corn, baked mashed potatoes, cranberry chutney, rolls, pumpkin ribbon bread, and pumpkin pie. None of it is low-fat; all of it is wonderful. Gave us a chance to use our seldom-used china in our rarely used dining room. We started the day with the neighborhood Turkey Trot two-mile walk/run and finished by playing lots of Mah Jongg and drinking. Can't think of any better way to spend the day.
All I'll dispense with listing the many things for which I am thankful - I know how fortunate I am.
Friday morning we left for San Antonio. (Can you believe I drove away from all those leftovers? We'll have plenty to eat when we return home ...) We have a lovely hotel on the Riverwalk, and everything is within walking distance. Yesterday we walked to the Alamo, past the historic Joske's department store, the Menger Hotel, La Villita, St. Joseph's Church, Hemisfair Park, and the Riverwalk. It was lovely. And it was cold - 45 and drizzly. We did dress properly, but wow - that wind can go right through you.
Dinner was at Hard Rock Cafe when we realized the kids had never been there, and we figured Alison would get a kick out of it - never mind that we have one in Houston. Man, there is a lot of pointless rock "memorabilia" out there.
Last night was the lighting of the holiday lights on the Riverwalk and the parade of barges down the river. We considered watching from the hotel balcony, but it was very windy out there, and we were up high enough that it was hard to see well. So we went to the Riverwalk right behind out hotel and were able to watch from there. It was great - the lighted barges all had music - some had live bands - so it was more of floating concert to the strains of Jimmy Buffett, Van Morrison, Freddy Fender, Los Lobos, and countless showtunes. Such fun - we thoroughly enjoyed it.
Today we drove out to see several of the missions on the outskirts of the city. We only toured one - you get the idea - but we did like the movie about the development of the missions and the way the indigenous populations were treated by the conquering Spaniards - interesting stuff. We went to lunch at the Liberty Saloon, a funny little place in a building that lists - noticeably - to the left. The food was great and the atmosphere fun, even if you did have to make sure your things didn't roll across the room (!) Their pies were fantastic.
The girls wanted to check out the Children's Museum, so we did, and I'm sorry to say that we have nearly outgrown such places. Came back to the hotel, went to Happy Hour and played Yahtzee - four Yahtzees, four dances (you have to do the Yahtzee dance, even in public), and Alison tested all of my and Gary's drinks - we are so proud of her knowledge of mixed drinks. It should serve her well should she continue her interest in drama and need to sideline as a waiter or bartender - !
We are now watching Kansas v. Missouri - we saw one of Gary's college friends on Game Day this morning who now works for ESPN. Truman the Tiger Webkinz is watching with us for luck ... I am really hoping I can e-mail my former colleague who went to KU, giddy with victory. It's a little too early to gloat - I'll just keep my fingers crossed.
Mizzou-rah!!
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Little bits of nothing
Fall has come to Texas.
By fall I mean that temperatures are below 75, with the nights down in the 40s. It is really lovely. And I am just crazy enough that I actually wish it were colder.
I like warm weather - truly, I do. I love swimning, the beach, summer dresses with sandals. But I love warm weather when it's appropriate. And being one who grew up in the Midwest, with four distinct seasons, I want fall. And winter. When we moved here, I thought I would relish the warmer temperatures - I was thrilled to leave the cold and snow behind.
And now? I realize that I actually miss the change, that i do not want to wear sandals in November, capris in December. Chalk it up to lessons learned.
I had to smile the other day. It was mid-60s, and I saw a woman at Target wearing capris and flip flops, another wearing a turtleneck and boots. Another guy had on a parka - ! Gotta love the Texan reaction to the "cold."
The weekend has been somewhat less productive than I might have liked. Gary came home, so I once again have a co-parent (handy when Alison called at 3.15 am that she was home from Fort Worth and needed someone to pick her up at school). Maddie decided she wanted to see Psycho, and as it was the one weekend of the year when it was not on cable - naturally - we cashed in a video rental coupon in order to enjoy some classic Hitchcock, complete with a "Making of ..." documentary (I love those) and the theatrical trailer. It remains one of the scariest movies I have ever seen - even when I know what is coming. I love it.
Bought new black boots to replace the ones I bought several years ago that have officially worn out. I've been looking for years (I am very picky regarding heel height and style, and while I can always find the characteristics I seek, I am not always willing to pay the requested price). Last year, I found the perfect pair, but I opted to buy them in brown, as my brown boots were hurting my feet (they were clearly purchased before one of the girls was born). I didn't particularly want the same boots in two different colors, so I waited. Now, out of absolute necessity, I made the black purchase. And they are stunning.
By this point I would imagine you are regretting logging on to read this - who finds the minutiae of others' shoe shopping even remotely interesting?
But it gets better: We went to a party last night with great live music. But we had the two younger girls with us, and they were "too tired" by 10 pm. (read: bored) so we had to leave. Made a mental note next time to leave them at home.
Made my shopping list and to-do list for the week, in order to get ready for Thanksgiving here on Thursday. Not a huge crowd - just us and the grandparents - but I do enjoy hosting. I love to cook for this holiday - I have a fantastic set of recipes from a class Helen and I took. The best part? It can all be made ahead of time. So I'll be busy the next couple of days, cooking in advance to that Thursday morning is not a frenzied mess. I only make the pie on Thursday (and the turkey, of course) - everything else is done early.
But I will have to clean off the desk in the office - slash - guest room, which is piled high with my works-in-progress. A semblence of tidiness will be in order.
This, sadly, is my entire list of accomplishments for the weekend. There is much more I could have, should have, done. But I no longer beat myself up about these thngs. Life is short, and some days, it's OK to just take it easy, watch Missouri football on TV, watch a movie with the kids or play Yahtzee (all of which we did). We all enjoy life in different ways; sometimes, a little enjoyement is worth a lot.
By fall I mean that temperatures are below 75, with the nights down in the 40s. It is really lovely. And I am just crazy enough that I actually wish it were colder.
I like warm weather - truly, I do. I love swimning, the beach, summer dresses with sandals. But I love warm weather when it's appropriate. And being one who grew up in the Midwest, with four distinct seasons, I want fall. And winter. When we moved here, I thought I would relish the warmer temperatures - I was thrilled to leave the cold and snow behind.
And now? I realize that I actually miss the change, that i do not want to wear sandals in November, capris in December. Chalk it up to lessons learned.
I had to smile the other day. It was mid-60s, and I saw a woman at Target wearing capris and flip flops, another wearing a turtleneck and boots. Another guy had on a parka - ! Gotta love the Texan reaction to the "cold."
The weekend has been somewhat less productive than I might have liked. Gary came home, so I once again have a co-parent (handy when Alison called at 3.15 am that she was home from Fort Worth and needed someone to pick her up at school). Maddie decided she wanted to see Psycho, and as it was the one weekend of the year when it was not on cable - naturally - we cashed in a video rental coupon in order to enjoy some classic Hitchcock, complete with a "Making of ..." documentary (I love those) and the theatrical trailer. It remains one of the scariest movies I have ever seen - even when I know what is coming. I love it.
Bought new black boots to replace the ones I bought several years ago that have officially worn out. I've been looking for years (I am very picky regarding heel height and style, and while I can always find the characteristics I seek, I am not always willing to pay the requested price). Last year, I found the perfect pair, but I opted to buy them in brown, as my brown boots were hurting my feet (they were clearly purchased before one of the girls was born). I didn't particularly want the same boots in two different colors, so I waited. Now, out of absolute necessity, I made the black purchase. And they are stunning.
By this point I would imagine you are regretting logging on to read this - who finds the minutiae of others' shoe shopping even remotely interesting?
But it gets better: We went to a party last night with great live music. But we had the two younger girls with us, and they were "too tired" by 10 pm. (read: bored) so we had to leave. Made a mental note next time to leave them at home.
Made my shopping list and to-do list for the week, in order to get ready for Thanksgiving here on Thursday. Not a huge crowd - just us and the grandparents - but I do enjoy hosting. I love to cook for this holiday - I have a fantastic set of recipes from a class Helen and I took. The best part? It can all be made ahead of time. So I'll be busy the next couple of days, cooking in advance to that Thursday morning is not a frenzied mess. I only make the pie on Thursday (and the turkey, of course) - everything else is done early.
But I will have to clean off the desk in the office - slash - guest room, which is piled high with my works-in-progress. A semblence of tidiness will be in order.
This, sadly, is my entire list of accomplishments for the weekend. There is much more I could have, should have, done. But I no longer beat myself up about these thngs. Life is short, and some days, it's OK to just take it easy, watch Missouri football on TV, watch a movie with the kids or play Yahtzee (all of which we did). We all enjoy life in different ways; sometimes, a little enjoyement is worth a lot.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Stress relief
Lots of ways to put off doing what I should be doing. Lots of ways to deal with stress.
Like blogging, for example. Or shopping. Which I did today - nothing like a stop at Ann Taylor to make me feel better. Plus a run through Dillard's. I need a dress for a Christmas party. So I looked, a bit, got some ideas. Found lots of separates, lots of spangly tops with sequins. But I'm not sure that's the look I'm going for. I browsed in Dillard's, found a stunning coat (that I would wear once a year), a couple maybes. Then I hit the part of the store where the sweaters have large cats on them ... I was done.
Who wears those? I mean, really?
I am already down one husband this week, and tomorrow I'll be minus a daughter, as Alison heads off to Fort Worth for the thespian convention. It will be strangely quiet around here.
Saturday night, we went to dinner, the entire family. I ordered a drink, and the waiter asked for ID. You are kidding, I said. No, he was completely serious. I complied, and he returned it, saying, You don't look that old.
Flattering, naturally. But I'm thinking that it's not so much a testament to my youthful glamour as it is a sign of his cluelessness. I mean really, what did he see? A couple with their three daughters? Or Gary with his three daughters and his teenage girlfriend?
Scary stuff. But it's always nice to know I can pass for my daughter's elder sister.
Like blogging, for example. Or shopping. Which I did today - nothing like a stop at Ann Taylor to make me feel better. Plus a run through Dillard's. I need a dress for a Christmas party. So I looked, a bit, got some ideas. Found lots of separates, lots of spangly tops with sequins. But I'm not sure that's the look I'm going for. I browsed in Dillard's, found a stunning coat (that I would wear once a year), a couple maybes. Then I hit the part of the store where the sweaters have large cats on them ... I was done.
Who wears those? I mean, really?
I am already down one husband this week, and tomorrow I'll be minus a daughter, as Alison heads off to Fort Worth for the thespian convention. It will be strangely quiet around here.
Saturday night, we went to dinner, the entire family. I ordered a drink, and the waiter asked for ID. You are kidding, I said. No, he was completely serious. I complied, and he returned it, saying, You don't look that old.
Flattering, naturally. But I'm thinking that it's not so much a testament to my youthful glamour as it is a sign of his cluelessness. I mean really, what did he see? A couple with their three daughters? Or Gary with his three daughters and his teenage girlfriend?
Scary stuff. But it's always nice to know I can pass for my daughter's elder sister.
Friday, November 09, 2007
Youth Lust
Or: Yes, I watched The Osmonds on Oprah today - how about you?
I know, I know - I have a jillion things to do. But I could not resist weighing in. The Osmonds! And I was never a huge fan, even.
When I saw the promos, I knew I'd be tuning in - how could I pass up an hour of traveling back in time, watching Donny and Marie - and little Jimmy, too? Takes me right back to fourth grade - I have distinct memories of watching this show at a friend's house. Though my memories go back much further - I remember listening to Puppy Love on a 45 at my friend Debra's house in first or second grade, and I remember my friend Janet having a major crush on Donny (it must have been her post-David Cassidy phase).
Besides, who couldn't love those shots of the Osmond jumpsuits? The 70s. They were one happening decade.
And I have to give them credit - they seem like a nice family. You only get to see the public side, but still. And Donny has aged well - he looks better now, at 49 (!) than he did as a teenager. (And he wore a purple shirt -!)
But. I'm not really one to lust after my lost youth. First of all, it isn't lost just yet - I feel fairly young, and the parent of one of Alison's friends told me, at pick-up one night, that I looked like one of the students (flattery will get you everywhere, sir ...) And secondly, I live in the present. And for the most part, things today are pretty good. Or they could be worse, anyway.
None the less, it is always fun to revisit parts of my youth. It's a little surreal to watch it through the filter of time - and I have to gently remind my giggling children that they, too, will have this experience - all those clothing styles they love will, one day, look equally dated. Trust me.
I have equally fond feelings for most TV shows I watched all those years ago: That Girl. Batman. Partridge Family. Brady Bunch. What's Happening. Maybe because it's like watching your childhood - we weren't armed with round-the-clock video surveillance, so watching those shows is like taking a step back in time. Or perhaps because it takes me back to a simpler time - a time when life was easy, when my only worries were which friend to call, which game to play. No job, no bills, no real responsibilities.
I wouldn't trade places, mind you - no need to return to the days of track shorts and tube socks, feathered hair and shag carpet. But it's fun to take a peek.
This is the second time this week I've watched Oprah - probably the second time this year. I had to check out yesterday's show where she covered dressing for the ages. As with most makeover shows, those women looked fantastic with some fashion advice. I had to laugh with - not at - one woman, who was wearing clothes she had had for years. I laughed because I recognized every outfit they showed as something I would have worn in 1990. (And I confess, guiltily, a few of those items still hang in my closet ... unworn, but they're there ... ) One woman, who was in her 60s, looked amazing in her before shots - maybe the tops were a little low and the pants a little tight, but she could get away with it. I hope I look that amazing at 60.
But really, I'm OK with the age I am. It's great to be 29 ...
I know, I know - I have a jillion things to do. But I could not resist weighing in. The Osmonds! And I was never a huge fan, even.
When I saw the promos, I knew I'd be tuning in - how could I pass up an hour of traveling back in time, watching Donny and Marie - and little Jimmy, too? Takes me right back to fourth grade - I have distinct memories of watching this show at a friend's house. Though my memories go back much further - I remember listening to Puppy Love on a 45 at my friend Debra's house in first or second grade, and I remember my friend Janet having a major crush on Donny (it must have been her post-David Cassidy phase).
Besides, who couldn't love those shots of the Osmond jumpsuits? The 70s. They were one happening decade.
And I have to give them credit - they seem like a nice family. You only get to see the public side, but still. And Donny has aged well - he looks better now, at 49 (!) than he did as a teenager. (And he wore a purple shirt -!)
But. I'm not really one to lust after my lost youth. First of all, it isn't lost just yet - I feel fairly young, and the parent of one of Alison's friends told me, at pick-up one night, that I looked like one of the students (flattery will get you everywhere, sir ...) And secondly, I live in the present. And for the most part, things today are pretty good. Or they could be worse, anyway.
None the less, it is always fun to revisit parts of my youth. It's a little surreal to watch it through the filter of time - and I have to gently remind my giggling children that they, too, will have this experience - all those clothing styles they love will, one day, look equally dated. Trust me.
I have equally fond feelings for most TV shows I watched all those years ago: That Girl. Batman. Partridge Family. Brady Bunch. What's Happening. Maybe because it's like watching your childhood - we weren't armed with round-the-clock video surveillance, so watching those shows is like taking a step back in time. Or perhaps because it takes me back to a simpler time - a time when life was easy, when my only worries were which friend to call, which game to play. No job, no bills, no real responsibilities.
I wouldn't trade places, mind you - no need to return to the days of track shorts and tube socks, feathered hair and shag carpet. But it's fun to take a peek.
This is the second time this week I've watched Oprah - probably the second time this year. I had to check out yesterday's show where she covered dressing for the ages. As with most makeover shows, those women looked fantastic with some fashion advice. I had to laugh with - not at - one woman, who was wearing clothes she had had for years. I laughed because I recognized every outfit they showed as something I would have worn in 1990. (And I confess, guiltily, a few of those items still hang in my closet ... unworn, but they're there ... ) One woman, who was in her 60s, looked amazing in her before shots - maybe the tops were a little low and the pants a little tight, but she could get away with it. I hope I look that amazing at 60.
But really, I'm OK with the age I am. It's great to be 29 ...
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Surfin to Success
I could title this - yet again - something along the lines of Wow, I have so much to do, and so little time in which to do it.
But that doesn't exactly make me special - everyone is busy; everyone has stuff to do.
Yet it's no less true. I've added an additional project, and it is taking up much of my time. So when I'm done, I'll have more time to dink around. In the meantime, I'm busy with some ... stuff.
But before I sign off, let me leave you with this image:
Picture, if you will, an elementary school auditorium. It is designed for a maximum capacity of, say, 350 people. But there are 200 third-graders in the school ... you et the idea. Chairs are set up for about 350 people, and another 150 stand, lining the perimeter of the room. The 200 afore-mentioned third-graders take the stage, all outfitted in bright colors (my own third-grade participant had on a bright red dress and a brightly colored lei - a birthday party leftover favor). And we are entertained by the sound of the Beach Boys, but for the lyrics "Surfin USA" substitute instead, "Surfin to Success."
Ah, yes - butchered Beach Boys - as if they aren't unbearable enough in their original form?
And still, with all its campiness, the evening was charming. Botched music, too many people (they need to schedule one more than one performance), parents with cameras blocking the view - all those annoyances were canceled out by the delight on the face of my daughter. She was front and center - and we were there early enough to get good seats - with a huge smile on her face the entire time. She's been practicing the lyrics at home for weeks and was so proud to sing for us.
I won't be sitting through elementary school performances for too much longer - only two more years. There's plenty of time for me to be cynical. For now, I'll just relax and enjoy the childhood of my youngest daughter. Surfin' to Success, indeed - she is well on her way.
But that doesn't exactly make me special - everyone is busy; everyone has stuff to do.
Yet it's no less true. I've added an additional project, and it is taking up much of my time. So when I'm done, I'll have more time to dink around. In the meantime, I'm busy with some ... stuff.
But before I sign off, let me leave you with this image:
Picture, if you will, an elementary school auditorium. It is designed for a maximum capacity of, say, 350 people. But there are 200 third-graders in the school ... you et the idea. Chairs are set up for about 350 people, and another 150 stand, lining the perimeter of the room. The 200 afore-mentioned third-graders take the stage, all outfitted in bright colors (my own third-grade participant had on a bright red dress and a brightly colored lei - a birthday party leftover favor). And we are entertained by the sound of the Beach Boys, but for the lyrics "Surfin USA" substitute instead, "Surfin to Success."
Ah, yes - butchered Beach Boys - as if they aren't unbearable enough in their original form?
And still, with all its campiness, the evening was charming. Botched music, too many people (they need to schedule one more than one performance), parents with cameras blocking the view - all those annoyances were canceled out by the delight on the face of my daughter. She was front and center - and we were there early enough to get good seats - with a huge smile on her face the entire time. She's been practicing the lyrics at home for weeks and was so proud to sing for us.
I won't be sitting through elementary school performances for too much longer - only two more years. There's plenty of time for me to be cynical. For now, I'll just relax and enjoy the childhood of my youngest daughter. Surfin' to Success, indeed - she is well on her way.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Boo!
I remember when I was about 6 or 7, I dressed up as Wacky Witch for Halloween. No one remembers her, I'm guessing - she was a comic book witch - maybe even on TV on Saturday mornings. She wore orange clothes and had a green face, and I think she was friendly. This was back in the days of wearing those plastic masks and carrying plastic pumpkins. Mine was really small but my older brother's was huge. So my dad's coat pockets were full of candy as I tried to keep up with my brother - who was dressed as a devil. Another one of those dime-store costumes with a red plastic mask.
Our own house was the last stop. We would ring the doorbell and shout Trick or Treat - my mom would look surprised that it was us. When we came inside, we dumped our candy into giant bowls. My dad came through and took a piece from each of us. Then we would swap out the candy we didn't like with whatever my mom was handing out. We'd trade a bit, and we'd plan on carrying our lunch for the next few days so that we could pack candy for dessert.
I'm not sure Halloween is all that different these days for my own children. The decorations are more extravagant, but most of it is the same: carving jack o'lanterns, creating costumes, getting candy. And on a school night, no less.
It's always been one of my favorite times of the year. I can respect people who don't celebrate it - it's their choice, naturally. But I don't get it. Sure, Halloween has ancient Pagan ties. But so do other holidays - Christmas, Easter. Plus, my guess is that those who are anti-Pagan have no clue what Pagans really believe.
But part of me can't believe you would want to pass up this night of fun.
Happy Halloween!
Our own house was the last stop. We would ring the doorbell and shout Trick or Treat - my mom would look surprised that it was us. When we came inside, we dumped our candy into giant bowls. My dad came through and took a piece from each of us. Then we would swap out the candy we didn't like with whatever my mom was handing out. We'd trade a bit, and we'd plan on carrying our lunch for the next few days so that we could pack candy for dessert.
I'm not sure Halloween is all that different these days for my own children. The decorations are more extravagant, but most of it is the same: carving jack o'lanterns, creating costumes, getting candy. And on a school night, no less.
It's always been one of my favorite times of the year. I can respect people who don't celebrate it - it's their choice, naturally. But I don't get it. Sure, Halloween has ancient Pagan ties. But so do other holidays - Christmas, Easter. Plus, my guess is that those who are anti-Pagan have no clue what Pagans really believe.
But part of me can't believe you would want to pass up this night of fun.
Happy Halloween!
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Progress
The surface of my desk is now nearly clean.
Though I must stress nearly. And I should probably point out that the floor of my office is now covered with nearly a dozen piles of paper, all of which require filing.
Thus I've come to a conclusion: I hate housework.
This isn't exactly news to me. I've already hired out the yardwork, hired out the heavy cleaning. Monica will be here tomorrow to take of the floors, the dusting, the bathrooms.
But I need to figure out a way to get the rest of it done. I am, as always, drowning in paper. I have a small planning desk in the kitchen, which holds mail, notes from school, coupons, brochures, and items of that ilk. My upstairs office (alternately known as the guest room, as it holds the futon; the workout room, as without a basement, the elliptical must live here; and the library, as it has two walls of bookcases) has the filed-away paperwork (of which there is plenty) and my myriad notes and interviews and files for projects on which I am working - of which there are also plenty.
Lucky for me, I have no shortage of ideas. Unluckily, I am a paper person. Meaning I cannot merely put these into electronic files - I like the use of actual paper and pen. Which means all this paper takes up a lot of space. And while I like to think I am organized, sadly, the reverse is more likely true: I cannot keep things tidy. I mean, they're tidy enough - trust me, as I've seen what a truly untidy office looks like. There is no pathway to the door lines with piles. But my desk is never clear of paper. At present there are no fewer than five post-its, a pile of CDs, a pile of computer CDs, pens, a pile of really relevant papers, a pile of school notes, and qutie a large pile of notes that holds log-in/password info for all those online sign-ins that I cannot remember without help.
This is a vast improvement from earlier today.
There are a couple of closets I need to get on. We've only lived here 20 months, and I've cleaned these closets before. How often must I do this task?
I'm thinking that what would really help is daily help, someone to come in, put things away (in a logical place, such as where I would have put it had I actually gotten around to it), unload and load the dishwasher, fold and put away laundry, and do a general once-over. Leaving me time to read and envelop myself in the creative process.
Wish me luck - I'm adding this to my Christmas list.
Though I must stress nearly. And I should probably point out that the floor of my office is now covered with nearly a dozen piles of paper, all of which require filing.
Thus I've come to a conclusion: I hate housework.
This isn't exactly news to me. I've already hired out the yardwork, hired out the heavy cleaning. Monica will be here tomorrow to take of the floors, the dusting, the bathrooms.
But I need to figure out a way to get the rest of it done. I am, as always, drowning in paper. I have a small planning desk in the kitchen, which holds mail, notes from school, coupons, brochures, and items of that ilk. My upstairs office (alternately known as the guest room, as it holds the futon; the workout room, as without a basement, the elliptical must live here; and the library, as it has two walls of bookcases) has the filed-away paperwork (of which there is plenty) and my myriad notes and interviews and files for projects on which I am working - of which there are also plenty.
Lucky for me, I have no shortage of ideas. Unluckily, I am a paper person. Meaning I cannot merely put these into electronic files - I like the use of actual paper and pen. Which means all this paper takes up a lot of space. And while I like to think I am organized, sadly, the reverse is more likely true: I cannot keep things tidy. I mean, they're tidy enough - trust me, as I've seen what a truly untidy office looks like. There is no pathway to the door lines with piles. But my desk is never clear of paper. At present there are no fewer than five post-its, a pile of CDs, a pile of computer CDs, pens, a pile of really relevant papers, a pile of school notes, and qutie a large pile of notes that holds log-in/password info for all those online sign-ins that I cannot remember without help.
This is a vast improvement from earlier today.
There are a couple of closets I need to get on. We've only lived here 20 months, and I've cleaned these closets before. How often must I do this task?
I'm thinking that what would really help is daily help, someone to come in, put things away (in a logical place, such as where I would have put it had I actually gotten around to it), unload and load the dishwasher, fold and put away laundry, and do a general once-over. Leaving me time to read and envelop myself in the creative process.
Wish me luck - I'm adding this to my Christmas list.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Thursday so soon?
Time alone with my computer has been fleeting, so say the least. Kids, work (and work time on the computer does not count as quality time, just for clarification), fruitless volunteer efforts, house stuff ... you get the idea. It's generally referred to as life.
Hmmm.
I had to punish a child last night; while the girls may disagree, it is not a task I relish. But sometimes, as was the case last night, it was necessary. Maybe someday she'll thank me; I doubt it's tomorrow.
I am thinking ahead to spring break, where our travels should take us. The girls want Hawaii, but I'm not sure that will happen - going to Hawaii is akin to taking the entire family to Europe. We've considered Big Bend National Park, a cruise, or an island. Sylvia wants to go to Colorado to see my brother and his girlfriend. But we've been to Colorado fairly recently ... and more importantly, Barb won't be there, as she'll be visiting her mother. So many places to go ... we're still thinking. We are going to San Antonio over Thanksgiving. It's one of those Texas must-see destinations. Thus we must see it.
The recycling initiative? Failed. The HOA board wants more evidence that residents want it. More than a 90 percent approval rate, I guess. Disappointing, to say the least. But we shall persevere - maybe next year will be the year?
Hope the rest of my day is not as dull as what I have just written ... maybe I'll spend some time searching for my muse, who appears to be hiding.
Hmmm.
I had to punish a child last night; while the girls may disagree, it is not a task I relish. But sometimes, as was the case last night, it was necessary. Maybe someday she'll thank me; I doubt it's tomorrow.
I am thinking ahead to spring break, where our travels should take us. The girls want Hawaii, but I'm not sure that will happen - going to Hawaii is akin to taking the entire family to Europe. We've considered Big Bend National Park, a cruise, or an island. Sylvia wants to go to Colorado to see my brother and his girlfriend. But we've been to Colorado fairly recently ... and more importantly, Barb won't be there, as she'll be visiting her mother. So many places to go ... we're still thinking. We are going to San Antonio over Thanksgiving. It's one of those Texas must-see destinations. Thus we must see it.
The recycling initiative? Failed. The HOA board wants more evidence that residents want it. More than a 90 percent approval rate, I guess. Disappointing, to say the least. But we shall persevere - maybe next year will be the year?
Hope the rest of my day is not as dull as what I have just written ... maybe I'll spend some time searching for my muse, who appears to be hiding.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Fall at last
The temperature dropped today. At 8 a.m. it was mid-70s; by 11, it was 57 degrees.
It was also rainy and windy - winds were gusting today up to 28 mph.
It was intense, grey and threatening. Yesterday the sun was shining and the air was muggy. What a difference a day makes.
I listen to the news all morning (though it's pledge week this week - bleah) so I knew the forecast; I knew to send my girls to school in jeans with sweatshirts. But I saw kids at the bus stop and other people today who clearly had no idea. It's tough when it changes so quickly with so little warning. Though I am stunned by how many people - not just here, but other places I've lived - do not read the paper, don't pay attention. How do they know what's going on?
I have stew in the crock pot, so it's like an actual fall evening here. Made myself some warm cider this afternoon. But I'm not expecting miracles - the weather will be warm again in the next few days. I'll just enjoy it while it lasts.
We've been successful with the recycling petitions - of those asked, more than 90 percent have said yes, they support adding curbside recycling, even for a fee. We've had a few no's, some from people who aren't interested, some who are ambivalent, and some from people who would do it but don't want to pay. But it shocks me when people are against it - who is against recycling? What kind of person opposes it? It is baffling.
The big presentation to the HOA is tomorrow. I have my outfit chosen - first things first - so I'm set. Oh - and I do know what I plan to say in the five-minute presentation. Wish us luck!
It was also rainy and windy - winds were gusting today up to 28 mph.
It was intense, grey and threatening. Yesterday the sun was shining and the air was muggy. What a difference a day makes.
I listen to the news all morning (though it's pledge week this week - bleah) so I knew the forecast; I knew to send my girls to school in jeans with sweatshirts. But I saw kids at the bus stop and other people today who clearly had no idea. It's tough when it changes so quickly with so little warning. Though I am stunned by how many people - not just here, but other places I've lived - do not read the paper, don't pay attention. How do they know what's going on?
I have stew in the crock pot, so it's like an actual fall evening here. Made myself some warm cider this afternoon. But I'm not expecting miracles - the weather will be warm again in the next few days. I'll just enjoy it while it lasts.
We've been successful with the recycling petitions - of those asked, more than 90 percent have said yes, they support adding curbside recycling, even for a fee. We've had a few no's, some from people who aren't interested, some who are ambivalent, and some from people who would do it but don't want to pay. But it shocks me when people are against it - who is against recycling? What kind of person opposes it? It is baffling.
The big presentation to the HOA is tomorrow. I have my outfit chosen - first things first - so I'm set. Oh - and I do know what I plan to say in the five-minute presentation. Wish us luck!
A Night at the Opera
Music. Drama. Passion. Fancy dress and prom dresses. Add every connected gay man in Houston, and you have opening night at the Houston Grand Opera.
You can also add me, as I was lucky enough to be in attendance, courtesy of my friend Nancy, who had press tickets. She often needs a date, since her husband travels, and I was fortunate to be No. 1 on her list.
The entire evening was wonderful, from the pre-Opera talk - which I never think to attend, as it starts at 6.15 p.m., which requires leaving the house at 5, but was well worth it - to the actual performance (Verdi's Masked Ball). Plus we enjoyed all the sidelines of a night out - getting dressed up, a glass of champagne before the show, dessert at the intermission.
And the best part? I didn't have to drive! Well, not that I ever do, as Gary does the driving when he's with me. But still ... with a friend, it's always a possibility.
As it was opening night, it was black tie for much of the crowd; the patrons had a ball of some sort, complete with masks, beforehand (alas, our tickets must have been lost in the mail) ... So half the fun was picking out the prom dresses (there were several), opera suits (worn by those over 70), and the trophy wives - several of those, too.
What to wear is such a crap shoot these days - there is no consistency. Nancy and I wore the basic black skirt combo - a perfect choice, by the way - just ask us. But there was an extreme variety, from those in sundresses and flip flops to the afore-mentioned opera suit and gowns that looked like poor relations of Academy Awards gowns. Nancy said on Sunday afternoon, you're likely to see people in Birkenstocks.
Not that it really matters - I was there for the performance, which was, as always, fantastique! One of the advantages of the big city is the arts, so it was fun to take advantage. I can't quite swing a season ticket - they have 8 or 10 operas a year, so it's nearly an opera a month, which is tricky to coordinate with three children at home. But this one was perfect - Gary was still out of town, the girls were un-busy, and I was definitely in the mood for some Verdi.
Bella Noche.
You can also add me, as I was lucky enough to be in attendance, courtesy of my friend Nancy, who had press tickets. She often needs a date, since her husband travels, and I was fortunate to be No. 1 on her list.
The entire evening was wonderful, from the pre-Opera talk - which I never think to attend, as it starts at 6.15 p.m., which requires leaving the house at 5, but was well worth it - to the actual performance (Verdi's Masked Ball). Plus we enjoyed all the sidelines of a night out - getting dressed up, a glass of champagne before the show, dessert at the intermission.
And the best part? I didn't have to drive! Well, not that I ever do, as Gary does the driving when he's with me. But still ... with a friend, it's always a possibility.
As it was opening night, it was black tie for much of the crowd; the patrons had a ball of some sort, complete with masks, beforehand (alas, our tickets must have been lost in the mail) ... So half the fun was picking out the prom dresses (there were several), opera suits (worn by those over 70), and the trophy wives - several of those, too.
What to wear is such a crap shoot these days - there is no consistency. Nancy and I wore the basic black skirt combo - a perfect choice, by the way - just ask us. But there was an extreme variety, from those in sundresses and flip flops to the afore-mentioned opera suit and gowns that looked like poor relations of Academy Awards gowns. Nancy said on Sunday afternoon, you're likely to see people in Birkenstocks.
Not that it really matters - I was there for the performance, which was, as always, fantastique! One of the advantages of the big city is the arts, so it was fun to take advantage. I can't quite swing a season ticket - they have 8 or 10 operas a year, so it's nearly an opera a month, which is tricky to coordinate with three children at home. But this one was perfect - Gary was still out of town, the girls were un-busy, and I was definitely in the mood for some Verdi.
Bella Noche.
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Where did the week go?
The humidity has broken. It's about time - the heat here is killing me. As I've mentioned before - so pardon the repeat - I am missing fall. Turning leaves, cooler temperatures, apple cider, bonfires. I feel a strong need to reclaim that part of fall.
It will happen eventually. But not soon enough for me.
It's been a busy week. Gary has been gone, which means I'm the only parent. Lucky for me, our girls are pretty even-tempered and we have not had any major meltdowns. And in some ways, I don't mind it when Gary's gone - no elaborate cooking, my time is my own. But I miss him, too, and I know the girls do.
Tuesday I had lunch with Maddie; Thursday was Alison's turn (I took Sylvia lunch last week). They both invited me to stay. And let me tell you, high school and middle school cafeterias are not for the weak at heart. They are loud. Crowded. And full of food that is anything but appetizing. Alison's friends were eating school lunch: Pizza, tater tots, and rolls. ??? To be fair, they purchase these items a la carte. And I saw other kids with salads (the salad line was shorter, one of her friends said). But mostly, I was turned off. But not by seeing Alison - it was fun to visit her in the middle of the day.
Stupid work stuff this week. A friend mentioned that she knows a career counselor - sort of like therapy without having to discuss your dreams and your parents. I should get her number and decide what I want to do when I grow up. If I grow up.
At present I am importing CDs into iTunes. Gary told me he had put in about everything he wanted from our music collection ... which I mistakenly took to mean was everything I like, too. But a quick glance at all the CDs he did not include was shocking - no Nick Lowe? Dwight Yoakum? Paul Simon? REM? Tom Petty? Beatles? Van Morrison? Are you as outraged as I am? And that's not even the full list. I may have to file for divorce. I mean, really - this is almost unforgivable.
He'll be home in just a few minutes ... perhaps he can redeem himself with gifts from Germany. One Ritter Sport ought to do it. For the uninitiated, they are chocolate bars. The best. Let's hope I'm eating one later tonight ...
It will happen eventually. But not soon enough for me.
It's been a busy week. Gary has been gone, which means I'm the only parent. Lucky for me, our girls are pretty even-tempered and we have not had any major meltdowns. And in some ways, I don't mind it when Gary's gone - no elaborate cooking, my time is my own. But I miss him, too, and I know the girls do.
Tuesday I had lunch with Maddie; Thursday was Alison's turn (I took Sylvia lunch last week). They both invited me to stay. And let me tell you, high school and middle school cafeterias are not for the weak at heart. They are loud. Crowded. And full of food that is anything but appetizing. Alison's friends were eating school lunch: Pizza, tater tots, and rolls. ??? To be fair, they purchase these items a la carte. And I saw other kids with salads (the salad line was shorter, one of her friends said). But mostly, I was turned off. But not by seeing Alison - it was fun to visit her in the middle of the day.
Stupid work stuff this week. A friend mentioned that she knows a career counselor - sort of like therapy without having to discuss your dreams and your parents. I should get her number and decide what I want to do when I grow up. If I grow up.
At present I am importing CDs into iTunes. Gary told me he had put in about everything he wanted from our music collection ... which I mistakenly took to mean was everything I like, too. But a quick glance at all the CDs he did not include was shocking - no Nick Lowe? Dwight Yoakum? Paul Simon? REM? Tom Petty? Beatles? Van Morrison? Are you as outraged as I am? And that's not even the full list. I may have to file for divorce. I mean, really - this is almost unforgivable.
He'll be home in just a few minutes ... perhaps he can redeem himself with gifts from Germany. One Ritter Sport ought to do it. For the uninitiated, they are chocolate bars. The best. Let's hope I'm eating one later tonight ...
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Crisis of holidays
When I was a girl, everyone celebrated Halloween.
We all donned masks and costumes, gathered our plastic pumpkins, and went trick-or-treating. We had parties in school - complete with costumes - and we sang pumpkin carols (courtesy of Hallmark and Charles Schulz) in music class. My mother hung pasteboard pumpkin cut-outs in our living room windows, and we carved our jack-o-lanterns. Dishes of candy corn sat on the table in the living room, and we ate mini candy bars for days afterwards.
It's always been one of my favorite holidays. One year, we had a party in our garage, complete with apple bobbing and a fortune teller. Every year I pull out my well-worn copy of Harvest of Holidays and read my girls The Blue-Nosed Witch, a story they love.
It's just fun.
Thesse days, the girls don't celebrate at school. The celebration has been pulled because - and I"m just assuming, but I'm sure this is accurate - some people do not celebrate this holiday, and the schools don't want to offend famlies or exclude children who don't celebrate this day.
Political correctness run amok? Perhaps. But it's a decision I can live with, even support.
In the doctor's office the other day, I overhead several of the nurses and lab techs in the hallway, bemoaning the fact the our school district no longer calls the December break "Christmas break." They no longer have a Christmas pageant or have Easter vacation. Oh, they said, if they had kids in the district, they just wouldn't tolerate this.
But what about parents and children who don't celebrate Christmas? Or Easter? Why should they have to take part, however tacitly, in holidays that are not part of their religion or their tradition? Why do Christians get to assume everyone is the same?
We are a country of varying beliefs, a melting pot of nationalities and traditions. If schools celebrate any religion above another, or lead prayers, then it implies that this is the ONLY religion, thus excluding children with other beliefs. In the United States, this goes against the Constitution.
Come December, we will put up a Christmas tree - or four. We will sing carols and give gifts. And we will go to church on Christmas Eve. But we will go to our church and hear the Christmas message the way we believe it. In the weeks before Christmas, we will celebrate the winter solstice, and we will light the menorah for Hanukkah. This coincides with our beliefs, and I appreciate the freedom we have to worship the way we choose. If this means sacrificing a school Halloween party in order to respect others, it's a compromise I can live with.
By taking these celebrations out of the public schools, we don't lose anything, really. We have our pumpkins out and orange lights on the porch. My children will trick-or-treat, as will their friends - our neighborhood takes its Halloweening very seriously. But I have to respect those who do not care to participate - it's their right.
I like a good, scary Halloween as much as the next gal, but I am terrified by taking away or belitting someone else's rights. I'll settle for the minor scare of the Boo! from hoardes of trick-or-treaters at my door. I think it's a fair trade.
We all donned masks and costumes, gathered our plastic pumpkins, and went trick-or-treating. We had parties in school - complete with costumes - and we sang pumpkin carols (courtesy of Hallmark and Charles Schulz) in music class. My mother hung pasteboard pumpkin cut-outs in our living room windows, and we carved our jack-o-lanterns. Dishes of candy corn sat on the table in the living room, and we ate mini candy bars for days afterwards.
It's always been one of my favorite holidays. One year, we had a party in our garage, complete with apple bobbing and a fortune teller. Every year I pull out my well-worn copy of Harvest of Holidays and read my girls The Blue-Nosed Witch, a story they love.
It's just fun.
Thesse days, the girls don't celebrate at school. The celebration has been pulled because - and I"m just assuming, but I'm sure this is accurate - some people do not celebrate this holiday, and the schools don't want to offend famlies or exclude children who don't celebrate this day.
Political correctness run amok? Perhaps. But it's a decision I can live with, even support.
In the doctor's office the other day, I overhead several of the nurses and lab techs in the hallway, bemoaning the fact the our school district no longer calls the December break "Christmas break." They no longer have a Christmas pageant or have Easter vacation. Oh, they said, if they had kids in the district, they just wouldn't tolerate this.
But what about parents and children who don't celebrate Christmas? Or Easter? Why should they have to take part, however tacitly, in holidays that are not part of their religion or their tradition? Why do Christians get to assume everyone is the same?
We are a country of varying beliefs, a melting pot of nationalities and traditions. If schools celebrate any religion above another, or lead prayers, then it implies that this is the ONLY religion, thus excluding children with other beliefs. In the United States, this goes against the Constitution.
Come December, we will put up a Christmas tree - or four. We will sing carols and give gifts. And we will go to church on Christmas Eve. But we will go to our church and hear the Christmas message the way we believe it. In the weeks before Christmas, we will celebrate the winter solstice, and we will light the menorah for Hanukkah. This coincides with our beliefs, and I appreciate the freedom we have to worship the way we choose. If this means sacrificing a school Halloween party in order to respect others, it's a compromise I can live with.
By taking these celebrations out of the public schools, we don't lose anything, really. We have our pumpkins out and orange lights on the porch. My children will trick-or-treat, as will their friends - our neighborhood takes its Halloweening very seriously. But I have to respect those who do not care to participate - it's their right.
I like a good, scary Halloween as much as the next gal, but I am terrified by taking away or belitting someone else's rights. I'll settle for the minor scare of the Boo! from hoardes of trick-or-treaters at my door. I think it's a fair trade.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Monday: The week begins
When we get some rain, we get a lot of rain.
This is how the rain operates here in Houston. We have either a dearth of rain or an excess - nothing here in moderation. So I was happy to cancel the eye doctor appointment this afternoon and just curl up with the girls. Glad I did, as there were flash floods all over and the freeways were a mess. It poured for the better part of three hours; last I checked, it was still coming down.
The vast amounts of concrete here contribute to the tendency for floods here. Chalk up yet another of Houston's charms.
Gary left on a business trip today. On the bright side, we are accumulating miles in anticipation of spring break, and flights to Europe help. (Plus he needs to maintain his Platinum status with Continental. Though we've noticed, here in Houston, EVERYBODY has platinum or gold status. And what is having special status when everyone has it? It doesn't really feel exclusive ... fortunately, at other airports we do ...) I noticed on the credit card bill today that Macy's gives double miles, as does CVS. I'll stop paying cash there, I guess.
On the down side, however, I am a single parent for the week. But it's kind of fun in a way - the girls and I get to hang out, eat what we like for dinner without someone putting the pressure on us to cook "real" meals and eat at the table - we sort of like to eat in front of the television, watch DWTS.
Let's just hope the girls behave all week. We're off to a good start - Maddie helped Sylvia with her math flash cards while I loaded the dishwasher and put the laundry in.
I sent in an invoice for a bunch of articles I wrote - it's sort of a big one. I know, I know, not that fascinating. But I have to find my joy where I can.
Trash goes out tonight. Which I must do, as the only adult around. I hope the rain has stopped.
This is how the rain operates here in Houston. We have either a dearth of rain or an excess - nothing here in moderation. So I was happy to cancel the eye doctor appointment this afternoon and just curl up with the girls. Glad I did, as there were flash floods all over and the freeways were a mess. It poured for the better part of three hours; last I checked, it was still coming down.
The vast amounts of concrete here contribute to the tendency for floods here. Chalk up yet another of Houston's charms.
Gary left on a business trip today. On the bright side, we are accumulating miles in anticipation of spring break, and flights to Europe help. (Plus he needs to maintain his Platinum status with Continental. Though we've noticed, here in Houston, EVERYBODY has platinum or gold status. And what is having special status when everyone has it? It doesn't really feel exclusive ... fortunately, at other airports we do ...) I noticed on the credit card bill today that Macy's gives double miles, as does CVS. I'll stop paying cash there, I guess.
On the down side, however, I am a single parent for the week. But it's kind of fun in a way - the girls and I get to hang out, eat what we like for dinner without someone putting the pressure on us to cook "real" meals and eat at the table - we sort of like to eat in front of the television, watch DWTS.
Let's just hope the girls behave all week. We're off to a good start - Maddie helped Sylvia with her math flash cards while I loaded the dishwasher and put the laundry in.
I sent in an invoice for a bunch of articles I wrote - it's sort of a big one. I know, I know, not that fascinating. But I have to find my joy where I can.
Trash goes out tonight. Which I must do, as the only adult around. I hope the rain has stopped.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Is this stuff for real?
I missed the mail today. I have had thank you notes from the girls' birthdays - all of which occurred more than a month ago, oops - on my desk for weeks. All I need to do is put stamps on the envelopes and put them in the out-going mail.
Apparently this is too much for me. Maybe I can ask the housekeeper to do it for me; it's the only way I can get anything done is by outsourcing.
That Ann Coulter is back in the news. I hesitate to mention this, lest it give her more notoriety. But really. Does she really mean anything she says, or is she just trying to stir up controversy? This week she's on a roll: First, she has suggested that we (the United States) would be better off if women did not vote. Yes, you read that correctly. Apparently, according to Ms. Coulter, women voters are to blame for electing Democrats. If women didn't vote, then we would no longer be in danger of having Democratic presidents.
I won't even dignify her comment with a response. But her next one is a real doozy: According to Coulter, life in America would be much simpler if we were all Christian. When she dreams of a happy America, she thinks back to the Republican convention. She sees people who are all alike, and it makes her happy. Besides, she says, Jews are halfway to being Christian anyway; they just need to be "perfected."
There is no way I'm making this up - I am not that creative. I just keep wondering what her motivation is. Publicity? Attention? Provoking others? Hearing the sound of her own voice?
This week has been exhausting. Kids, work, blah, blah. I finally - finally! - have some of my life under control. Let's see if I can corral the rest this weekend.
Apparently this is too much for me. Maybe I can ask the housekeeper to do it for me; it's the only way I can get anything done is by outsourcing.
That Ann Coulter is back in the news. I hesitate to mention this, lest it give her more notoriety. But really. Does she really mean anything she says, or is she just trying to stir up controversy? This week she's on a roll: First, she has suggested that we (the United States) would be better off if women did not vote. Yes, you read that correctly. Apparently, according to Ms. Coulter, women voters are to blame for electing Democrats. If women didn't vote, then we would no longer be in danger of having Democratic presidents.
I won't even dignify her comment with a response. But her next one is a real doozy: According to Coulter, life in America would be much simpler if we were all Christian. When she dreams of a happy America, she thinks back to the Republican convention. She sees people who are all alike, and it makes her happy. Besides, she says, Jews are halfway to being Christian anyway; they just need to be "perfected."
There is no way I'm making this up - I am not that creative. I just keep wondering what her motivation is. Publicity? Attention? Provoking others? Hearing the sound of her own voice?
This week has been exhausting. Kids, work, blah, blah. I finally - finally! - have some of my life under control. Let's see if I can corral the rest this weekend.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
MId-week musings
I am drowning, drowning in a sea of uncompleted work. Laundry, bills, paperwork, filing, Halloween decorations that need to be pulled out, crap to put away, blogs to read ... you get the idea.
But really, is anyone's life different? Is there ever a day that is totally down? Nothing needing to be done? I'm not busier than anyone else - I just bitch about it more ;)
Yesterday I had a boatload of running around to do. Pick up one daughter, pick up another, run to Target, get dinner, run the youngest to Brownies, go to recycling meeting, blah, blah. Eldest daughter threw a monkey wrench in the plans when a) she asked me to give her friend a ride home (not around the corner, way out of my way) and b) her play practice ran late. I waited for nearly 20 minutes, finally left and came home. Did not make it to Target. Grrr. No sooner was I home than the phone rang: I'm ready! But by this time I really didn't have time to run her friend home. Long story short, I did (what would you say to a kid standing there without a ride?) but I was pissed. But I did get Sylvia to Brownies on time, so really, it wasn't the end of the world.
But close.
However, two bright spots on my day. One, the recycling meeting went well - 20 people on a weeknight? That is impressive - especially when you figure how many people sent regrets. Wow. We are charging forward on getting curbside recycling. It will cost - gasp - more than $2 per household/month. The horror.
Oh - and the survey they did last year? 2600+ houses in this subdivision - 150 surveys were returned. That is statistically insignificant if you ask me. And it failed by one or two votes. Stupid. My entire neighborhood is stupid. Any neighborhood that sends you a letter because they can see a glimpse of our trash cans is stupid.
And bright spot No. 2: I found a Web site that posts the music from my favorite high school band for free. Fools Face, they were called, and they were great - in that early 1980s, power pop kind of way. Everyone in the Missouri-Kansas-Illinois-Arkansas area would agree. Trust me. They were edgy, with tight harmonies and a fast beat. They made us feel smart and edgy, with their pseudo-intellectual lyrics that dealt with social commentary, from space colonization to handgun control to let's party.
They were the coolest. I'm not even sure all my college friends ever got the chance to see them - they played Columbia, MO, bunches - inside one of their albums is a band party photo, and my husband tells me it is the men's john in the Blue Note, which is only THE coolest club in Missouri (trust me, anybody who was/is anybody on the college/alternative music scene in the 80s played there). But the Fools left to hit the big time in California in late 1984. It sort of didn't happen, though apparently one of them became a decent producer out in LA. They play a reunion show every now and again back in my hometown of Springfield.
So, I downloaded not only their albums, but their singles and a couple of live shows - which reminds me of why they were so much fun live. With an eclectic mix of 50s and 60s covers following their set of originals, they seemed to play all night.
Once again, I am transported back to the 80s. I don't need to stay long, but it's always fun to visit.
Tomorrow I am home. Yay! Let's see if I can get anything accomplished ... I remain eternally optimistic.
But really, is anyone's life different? Is there ever a day that is totally down? Nothing needing to be done? I'm not busier than anyone else - I just bitch about it more ;)
Yesterday I had a boatload of running around to do. Pick up one daughter, pick up another, run to Target, get dinner, run the youngest to Brownies, go to recycling meeting, blah, blah. Eldest daughter threw a monkey wrench in the plans when a) she asked me to give her friend a ride home (not around the corner, way out of my way) and b) her play practice ran late. I waited for nearly 20 minutes, finally left and came home. Did not make it to Target. Grrr. No sooner was I home than the phone rang: I'm ready! But by this time I really didn't have time to run her friend home. Long story short, I did (what would you say to a kid standing there without a ride?) but I was pissed. But I did get Sylvia to Brownies on time, so really, it wasn't the end of the world.
But close.
However, two bright spots on my day. One, the recycling meeting went well - 20 people on a weeknight? That is impressive - especially when you figure how many people sent regrets. Wow. We are charging forward on getting curbside recycling. It will cost - gasp - more than $2 per household/month. The horror.
Oh - and the survey they did last year? 2600+ houses in this subdivision - 150 surveys were returned. That is statistically insignificant if you ask me. And it failed by one or two votes. Stupid. My entire neighborhood is stupid. Any neighborhood that sends you a letter because they can see a glimpse of our trash cans is stupid.
And bright spot No. 2: I found a Web site that posts the music from my favorite high school band for free. Fools Face, they were called, and they were great - in that early 1980s, power pop kind of way. Everyone in the Missouri-Kansas-Illinois-Arkansas area would agree. Trust me. They were edgy, with tight harmonies and a fast beat. They made us feel smart and edgy, with their pseudo-intellectual lyrics that dealt with social commentary, from space colonization to handgun control to let's party.
They were the coolest. I'm not even sure all my college friends ever got the chance to see them - they played Columbia, MO, bunches - inside one of their albums is a band party photo, and my husband tells me it is the men's john in the Blue Note, which is only THE coolest club in Missouri (trust me, anybody who was/is anybody on the college/alternative music scene in the 80s played there). But the Fools left to hit the big time in California in late 1984. It sort of didn't happen, though apparently one of them became a decent producer out in LA. They play a reunion show every now and again back in my hometown of Springfield.
So, I downloaded not only their albums, but their singles and a couple of live shows - which reminds me of why they were so much fun live. With an eclectic mix of 50s and 60s covers following their set of originals, they seemed to play all night.
Once again, I am transported back to the 80s. I don't need to stay long, but it's always fun to visit.
Tomorrow I am home. Yay! Let's see if I can get anything accomplished ... I remain eternally optimistic.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Checking off the list
The leaves are changing color, and the season is changing.
But not here in Houston. And for the first time, I am really missing fall.
I didn't think I would; I thought I'd be OK with summer all the time, no cold weather. But I'm not. I miss the cooler temps, the switch to sweaters, the smell of the cold mornings. Here it is still 90 and humid. I'm sick of all my shorts and sandals, and I'm tired of the hot air hitting me in the face.
I want to wear sweaters, sit at a football game and sip hot chocolate. I want to curl up in front of the fire, put on mittens, and enjoy cozy winter afternoons.
Sigh.
I've done a bunch of little things today. After a weekend - OK, the last entire week - of not doing anything significant, I am playing catch up.
So I called the eye doctor about contacts; turns out they did call ... or so the chart says. But I'm not the first one to say I never got a phone call and have the chart indicate otherwise. Called the pest control guy; called the AT&T support line. Went grocery shopping.
I'm hopping.
Tonight is the big meeting for those of us in the neighborhood who are interested to meet and try to figure out how to get our HOA to institute curbside recycling. For whatever reason, it was put to a vote of the residents (a survey was sent out, and they calculated the results that were returned - needless to say, the return rate was low, yet it only failed by a few votes). But nothing else is decided this way - the board votes. So why was recycling put to a community-wide vote? We don't get to vote on other issues or the way the board spends money. My guess is that board members do not want to go on record as opposing this.
Drives me flipping nuts. So we'll see what we can change. If anything.
This is my life, such as it is. Jealous?
But not here in Houston. And for the first time, I am really missing fall.
I didn't think I would; I thought I'd be OK with summer all the time, no cold weather. But I'm not. I miss the cooler temps, the switch to sweaters, the smell of the cold mornings. Here it is still 90 and humid. I'm sick of all my shorts and sandals, and I'm tired of the hot air hitting me in the face.
I want to wear sweaters, sit at a football game and sip hot chocolate. I want to curl up in front of the fire, put on mittens, and enjoy cozy winter afternoons.
Sigh.
I've done a bunch of little things today. After a weekend - OK, the last entire week - of not doing anything significant, I am playing catch up.
So I called the eye doctor about contacts; turns out they did call ... or so the chart says. But I'm not the first one to say I never got a phone call and have the chart indicate otherwise. Called the pest control guy; called the AT&T support line. Went grocery shopping.
I'm hopping.
Tonight is the big meeting for those of us in the neighborhood who are interested to meet and try to figure out how to get our HOA to institute curbside recycling. For whatever reason, it was put to a vote of the residents (a survey was sent out, and they calculated the results that were returned - needless to say, the return rate was low, yet it only failed by a few votes). But nothing else is decided this way - the board votes. So why was recycling put to a community-wide vote? We don't get to vote on other issues or the way the board spends money. My guess is that board members do not want to go on record as opposing this.
Drives me flipping nuts. So we'll see what we can change. If anything.
This is my life, such as it is. Jealous?
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Feeling so '80s
It's like a sudden craving. Every once in a while, I just feel the need. And I can be instantly transported back to college. Or high school. And for three minutes, it is so much fun.
To be 18 again ... if only for a short time. But it's good to come back.
To be 18 again ... if only for a short time. But it's good to come back.
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